Trichotillomania

Ragtag Daily Prompt: YADA YADA YADA
One-word Challenge: ONLY

Tonkin’s Employment Record

“I see here, Mr Tonkin, that you’re a qualified machinist, and were employed at AeroHead Industries for just over a year.” Ms Jones, the Human Resources manager, held up Tonkin’s resume. “But you left that post last month. Can you tell me why?”

“Oh, sure. It’s like, the foreman on our shift was impossible to please. One day he called me into the office and spent a whole half hour yammering. I was doing my job, but he said I was late so often, took too many coffee breaks, spent company time on my phone…yada yada yada. You know how some foremen like to play the heavy? I couldn’t handle all the negative vibes so I told him to stuff it and I walked out. Any one would do the same.”

“I see. And before that you worked at FinTack, but only for eight months. Why did you leave that employment.”

“At first it was a great place to work, but then they fired the manager we all got along with so well. The one the company hired to replace him was a tyrant. I think he learned his people skills from Caligula. Squawked if we were late, ordered us to shut it when we were on the phone, kvetched about our lunch breaks taking so long. Yada yada yada.”

“And only eighteen months at Blastaway Inc?”

“That’s correct. But I don’t think you should use the word ONLY, ma’am. It has a distinctly negative connotation.”

“I’ll make a note of that, Mr Tonkins. And before Blastaway that you worked twenty months at Smelter Parts Assembly?”

“I need to tell you, Ms Jones, that I have a great work ethic and I always do a top-notch job. But I just couldn’t stick it at SPA. The supervisor was such a bear! I was breaking up with my girlfriend right then, so of course I had to talk to her. I explained it to him, but he still griped every time he saw me on my phone. What a hassle! I don’t know why so many companies hire such short-tempered foremen. I mean, a bit of compromise will go a long way toward keeping employees happy and productive, right?”

“Well, Mr Tonkins, foremen and supervisors do have to answer to production managers and corporate managers. They have to please the higher-ups, too – not just the workers.”

“Yeah. The whole industry needs a shake-up. You know, maybe I should get a Human resources job like yours. Then I could hire decent supervisors and clue in the higher-ups as well. Straighten out their employee expectations – we’re not slaves, after all. I’m thinking a few years in University should get me a degree in Business Management or whatever. How much does an HR manager get paid?”

“I think that’s an excellent idea, Mr Tonkins. I can definitely see that you’re much more suited to study than to manual labor. Here’s your resumé. Good luck, young man.”

As soon as Tonkins left her office Ms Jones asked her secretary to bring her the folder of resumés and a strong black coffee. “I’m suffering from trichotillomania,” she told her when the secretary set the folder on her desk.

She looked at her boss sharply. “What kind of mania is that? Have you had it long?”

“NO, only about ten minutes this time. Mr Tonkins brought it on. Trichotillomania is the abnormal urge to tear our your hair.”

The secretary laughed. “We can’t have that. One cup of strong black coffee coming right up.”

4 thoughts on “Trichotillomania

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